He gives and takes away...

Lately the song by Matt Redman has been on my mind. How do you sing Blessed be the name of the Lord, when you are going through a period of loss? Also, I am the type of person who likes to be in control, and when God takes things away I feel very "out of control". Yes, I know that in the very essence of the word "LORD" I am saying I am giving Him control, but I struggle with the thought and the action of actually doing that.

At cellgroup on Friday I asked if the other "faithful" ones would pray for me about this problem I have with surrendering to God.

This morning I was woken by my 6 year old at 4am - eeek - I didn't even know the hour existed ;). She quickly went to sleep, but I felt bothered, more than that, upset, alone, sad, used up (all nothing to do with my daughter). I got up and tried reading my bible, what else can one do with tears streaming down their faces and with the family all dead asleep. With no great revelation from there, I proceeded back to bed, still crying... it was then that a country and western song went through my head ( I hate c & w, by the way) and I felt God's presence fill my mind. I am going to see if I can find the words to it on the web, it was sooooo appropriate to how I have been feeling. If we just let God in to our existance, we can accomplish anything that seems difficult, He will help us, guide us, lead us.

He is GOOD, and I now feel able to sing blessed be HIS name, even when He gives and takes away, He knows what is best for me! Do you know God has a sense of humour, yesterday at church, when I was still struggling with the words of Matt Redman's song, it was on the worship song list - I can just see his smile.... It's a lesson He really want's me to learn, huh!